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  1. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Neville Chamberlain returns from Germany, claims ‘peace in our time’

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 25, 2017 at 12:51 PM with 0 replies and 1 views.

    Neville Chamberlain returns from Germany, claims ‘peace in our time’By Doug Trench, Defence Editor Neville Chamberlain flew home from Germany today, waved a white piece of paper and declared: “We have peace in our time.” Just hours after an extreme far-right party won its first seats in the Bundestag since before World War Two, Mr Chamberlain reassured Britain and the rest of Europe that The post Neville Chamberlain returns from Germany,...

  2. dan5

    Suffolk Highways (Kier)

    by dan5 in Offtopic ChatSep 23, 2017 at 8:59 PM with 1 replies and 9 views.

    No medals won for Suffolk Highways... this post will serve as documentation for their poor service whilst they milk the taxpayer. Suffolk County Council contract is currently with Kier - highly controversial to renew it.Feel free to post photos of their shoddy workmanship or to discuss it. (If they do well, feel free to give them some credit when it goes well)

    Latest reply: 607First, simply awesome job, well done Suffolk Highways. No prizes for guessing that is sarcasm.Second is a street cleaner directing traffic when the temporary roadworks traffic lights were inoperative. 608 Third is the Bury St Edmunds...

  3. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Unexpectedly for sale: 30,000 Toyota Prius cars

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 23, 2017 at 12:03 AM with 0 replies and 3 views.

    Unexpectedly for sale: 30,000 Toyota Prius carsFOR SALE! Owing to unforeseen circumstances, 30,000 used Toyota Prius cars have become available in London. Even though each of them is under three years old, they have probably had several owners and likely have more than 200,000 miles on the clock. And they probably smell a little bit of body odour and vomit. But The post Unexpectedly for sale: 30,000 Toyota Prius cars appeared first on...

  4. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Dog insists he did not sh*t on the kitchen floor

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 23, 2017 at 12:03 AM with 0 replies and 2 views.

    Dog insists he did not sh*t on the kitchen floorA labrador has confirmed he did not sh*t on the kitchen floor – and that the mess must have been left by an intruder of the night. One-year-old Brian insisted he was sound asleep from 10pm to 7am, but thought he might have heard a visitor roaming around downstairs at some point. “I can categorically The post Dog insists he did not sh*t on the kitchen floor appeared first on Suffolk Gazette....

  5. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Sir Elton John insists he’s not suicidal

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 21, 2017 at 11:54 PM with 0 replies and 7 views.

    Sir Elton John insists he’s not suicidalSir Elton John has reassured President Trump that he is “feeling absolutely fine” and is not having suicidal thoughts. Mr Trump told stunned delegates at the United Nations that Rocket Man “was on a suicide mission for himself and his regime”. But Sir Elton insisted this was “rubbish”, and that he actually has lots to The post Sir Elton John insists he’s not suicidal appeared first on Suffolk...

  6. dan5

    Clickbait: £650 Valentino heels identical to Primark £14

    by dan5 in Offtopic ChatSep 21, 2017 at 3:40 PM with 0 replies and 7 views.

    Signed out of Outlook... see how bad clickbait is now becoming... 588 How does the shoe/heels on the right look identical (or similar) to that on the left?The only similarities are the "nude" colour, the metal stud and the fact they are heels. Random I know but this is pathetic... the writer for the Mirror (appearing on MSN lifestyle) plugs both Primark and where you can get the full price pair of shoes from.

  7. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Waitrose trials child cages so customers can shop in peace

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 19, 2017 at 11:32 AM with 0 replies and 6 views.

    Waitrose trials child cages so customers can shop in peaceWaitrose has installed cages outside a Suffolk store so parents to lock up their unruly children, it has emerged. The secure pens allows shoppers to browse the supermarket aisles in peace without noisy and badly behaved kids running amok. Supermarket bosses say they are trialing the children’s cages at their Ipswich store in Futura Park. The post Waitrose trials child cages so...

  8. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Court orders Wayne Rooney to do unpaid work at Ipswich Town

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 18, 2017 with 0 replies and 8 views.

    Court orders Wayne Rooney to do unpaid work at Ipswich TownBy Hugh Dunnett, Crime Correspondent Drink-driving Wayne Rooney will drop down a division to play for Ipswich Town after magistrates ordered him to do unpaid work for the needy. Rooney, 31, admitted being nearly three times over the limit when he was stopped driving a woman’s VW Beetle early in the morning. He was banned The post Court orders Wayne Rooney to do unpaid work at...

  9. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Terrified roofer can only work on bungalows

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 18, 2017 with 0 replies and 7 views.

    Terrified roofer can only work on bungalowsA roofer will only work on bungalows – because he is afraid of heights. Karl Robinson, from Ipswich, has to turn down loads of work because he suffers from vertigo. His problems started three years ago when he had a panic attack while working on a two-storey terraced house in the town’s Bramford Road. “I The post Terrified roofer can only work on bungalows appeared first on Suffolk Gazette....

  10. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Mum sues store after tripping over HER OWN daughter

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 17, 2017 with 0 replies and 11 views.

    Mum sues store after tripping over HER OWN daughterA young mum is suing a shop for compensation after tripping over HER OWN toddler who was running around the aisles, it has emerged. Charlotte Pleasance, 24, of Woodbridge in Suffolk, is claiming damages for a twisted ankle and bruised hip after falling in the frozen food section of her local supermarket. She claims her The post Mum sues store after tripping over HER OWN daughter appeared...

  11. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Prison chain gangs to clear roadside litter

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 15, 2017 with 0 replies and 10 views.

    Prison chain gangs to clear roadside litterBy Rob Banks, Crime Editor Prison chain gangs will become a familiar sight on Suffolk’s roads as the Government trials a tough new approach to crime, it has emerged. We can reveal Ministers want prisoners to be used as forced labour to clear up litter from roads around the county. And to ensure the controversial The post Prison chain gangs to clear roadside litter appeared first on Suffolk...

  12. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Blaarst me: iPhone X will recognise Suffolk accent

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 15, 2017 with 0 replies and 9 views.

    Blaarst me: iPhone X will recognise Suffolk accentThe launch of the new iPhone will finally allow Siri to recognise the Suffolk accent, it has emerged. Ever since the talking personal assistant was introduced in 2011, it has been confused by the local dialect. But now Apple has reprogrammed its speech recognition – and Siri will understand ‘Suffolk’ when the iPhone X is The post Blaarst me: iPhone X will recognise Suffolk accent appeared...

  13. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Workers pretend they know all about Jane Austen

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 14, 2017 with 0 replies and 9 views.

    Workers pretend they know all about Jane AustenBritain’s workers today pretended they knew all about Jane Austen as they played around with the new plastic £10 note. The classic novelist appears on the new polymer tenner, which came into circulation today. There was excitement in offices up and down the country as workers took it in turns to try to rip and The post Workers pretend they know all about Jane Austen appeared first on Suffolk...

  14. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: Norfolk cycling star finishes Tour of Britain five days late

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 13, 2017 with 0 replies and 6 views.

    Norfolk cycling star finishes Tour of Britain five days lateBy Bernie Legg, Cycling Correspondent Norfolk’s entry into the Tour of Britain cycle race has finally finished the Suffolk stage – five days late. Monkey Alan Smith, 18, is the greatest ever cyclist to come out of Norfolk, but he found the tour stage tough going. Cycling enthusiasts said chimp Alan got lost on the The post Norfolk cycling star finishes Tour of Britain five days...

  15. ComedySatire

    Suffolk Gazette: ET Returns filming in Suffolk this week

    by ComedySatire in Offtopic ChatSep 13, 2017 with 0 replies and 8 views.

    ET Returns filming in Suffolk this weekScenes from ET Returns, the long-awaited sequel to the blockbuster 1980s film, are being shot in Suffolk this week, it has emerged. Walkers in Christchurch Park in Ipswich spotted film crews on a wooded track with the lovable alien in a familiar disguise. Hollywood producers are remaining tight-lipped about the script for ET Returns, but The post ET Returns filming in Suffolk this week appeared first...

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